Unbelievably I only have 3 more runs left to complete in my 100 day running challenge, and the question now shifts from IF I will finish, to HOW I will finish and I’ve thought of a few different scenarios over the past two weeks… it’s a great shame that mother nature just isn’t co-operating with me at this point. We have had snow all week, and even this morning I’ve woken up to another foot that had fallen overnight.
I don’t mind running in the snow, or the cold but hey, I’ve been running outside for three plus months now, sometimes in extreme and crazy conditions. Heck, I ran in January when it was minus 26 degrees. That my friends is dedication! I guess I just really wanted to end on a nice warm spring day, where I could just have shorts and a t-shirt on and just enjoy the beauty as I finish with a nice long run down to the lake and back. I still may do this run, it’s just that it will be cold and rainy on Tuesday.
I have a group call every Tuesday night with an amazing group of men that know of this challenge, and I am going to start that call while out running so they can all have a good laugh but I will already have completed the 100th earlier in the day, I guess that will be run 101. Seriously, I’ve had so much enjoyment with this challenge and I never thought that I would see it through. I figured injury, or my own head would get in the way of me finishing and it almost did.
i was at a pretty low point in March, in fact the whole month was a real struggle for me. I found myself withdrawing inside my own head, slid back (rather easily) into some bad habits and almost gave up this challenge completely. My body was tired and sore, my energy level started to decrease on a daily basis, some days I just didn’t even want to get out of bed. I hadn’t felt that low since last September when I had to walk away from my job at Keg because I was a grumpy, miserable fuck.
That all changed a few weeks ago with a phone call.
A mentor and friend of mine, Jason talked me through what was going on and the why of it all. He told me something that I have not heard enough of in my life…
YOU ARE WORTH IT. I BELIEVE IN YOU.
Very powerful words when one does not believe in themselves. I have these limiting beliefs, check that, I HAD these limiting beliefs that have held me in place my entire life. The journey that I have been on the last six months has been to smash through those beliefs and do some crazy and amazing things with my life, and my family. I have made some progress but always seemed to take a few steps forward then a few steps back.
NO MORE I SAY!! NO MORE!!
Having someone believe in me, having someone blow wind into my sails is all I have even wanted out of life, and in a relationship. I had just that for awhile and when it was taken away from me I collapsed like a house of cards. That’s life, right?
The foundation that I have worked to build the last six months remained strong, Jason helped shuffle those cards back up and I took them back and started to rebuild. I have had a few comments from various sources about being on fire recently, and boy I sure am. The introvert Ed Dillon, he gone just like a baseball player whiffing at strike three. Gone.
In it’s place stands a strong, confident compassionate man on a journey of personal growth and increased wisdom. I love that statement, it gives me goosebumps. But it’s true, it’s damn true.
This past week I have had meaningful and intense conversations with men from all over the planet, we truly like in a global age. Thursday past I spoke to guys from Australia, Missouri, Minnesota, Toronto and Texas all with intent and meaning. A year ago you couldn’t put me into a room with strangers, I would shy away and be a wall flower and feel totally uncomfortable. Today, I welcome these challenges, it pushes me out of my comfort zone and forces me to grow, and grow and grow.
I am very grateful for being on this path. My relationships with everyone has improved, my children most of all. Emily… i don’t even need to put it into words. Tears to my eyes… life is going to get very interesting, heck it already is.
Have a fantastic Sunday everyone, this guy is smiling ear to ear!